Well you can all let out a sigh of relief now, because I shall reveal all. Now most of you are going to be bitterly disappointed, because you all had your own ideas I guess of what it was to be about. Well, to most people it will be no big deal. But to those who have been in the same position as me, and have fought with their conscience at any time, you will know what I've gone through. In a nutshell, and for those who don't know much about me personally, I stopped eating meat, and became a vegetarian in 1994. Various reasons, but I'd never been a big meat eater, but did eat chicken, burgers, sausages, that sort of thing, but not one for meat that looked like dead animals if you know what I mean. Well when we started keeping chickens, I decided I couldn't eat them any more, nor did I like the thought of eating bits of cows or pigs (I never did eat lamb) so I stopped. I started to eat fish again after a couple of years, because I got pissed off with just having chips whenever we ate out (my other half used to love going to the chippy) and veggie options were very limited back then. So I wasn't a strict vegetarian for most of the time. So the confession is that this week, I ate chicken, in the form of a Chicken sandwich at MacDonalds. And it was bloody delicious. I wasn't sure if I could do it. I'd been thinking about it for a while, in all honesty since MacDonalds stopped doing the deli veggie melt and replaced it with a vile Mexican veggie burger with chilly sauce stuff dripping out of it. The last time I tried to eat "meat" was a bacon sarnie a few years ago, and I gagged, and couldn't swallow it. But this time, I'd made up my mind to try and just didn't think of what it was before. Anyone who has ever given up anything (like smoking I guess) and then started again will know what I'm going through. It's hard to explain. I feel sad, disappointed in myself, but at the same time, elated. The thing is, every time I go out, I see things that upset me, like birds or animals squashed in the road as one example. Everytime I see the news on television, I see something that upsets me. Every time I watch a nature programme I see something that upsets me. But I am powerless to prevent these things, they are still going to happen. And if I stop eating things that I enjoy, because of a principle, it's not going to stop things being killed to eat. And the way I look at it, my health has been crap for many years now, and it may just have something to do with my diet. So I'm prepared to give it a try, and fight the bad feelings I'm getting for giving in.
So there you have it. Not very exciting was it? But a bloody huge decision for me. And the reason I have now confessed is that I did it again today, this time I had a quarter-pounder, the first "red meat" I've eaten for 13 years. And again, I thoroughly enjoyed it. So did Emma, the first bit of burger she has ever had! I still don't think I could face seeing it as raw meat, but the occasional chicken thing or burger isn't going to change the world is it? I am also fed up with not being able to buy so many things because of the meat content. It's going to make life so much easier for me.
Okay to end, two pretty wildflowers that I took on the rough ground behind Morrisons where I took Emma after we had eaten! And it hasn't rained all day either, despite the forecast, it was quite nice for a couple of hours. It is raining now though, and getting darker by the second.